It is possible Reynaldo Lopez (5 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 10 Ks, ERA at 2.05) were actually in the NL Cy convo? Comatose Braves fan, “Reynaldo Lopez has run NL Cy? And Fried?! Really?!” Comatose Braves fan, hold on– “–No! I will not hold back! Also, Acuña for MVP! Or Albies? And–” Yes, and Riley, now go back to sleep. Wait until you hear Marcell Ozuna (1-for-3) hit his 37th homer yesterday. “And Ozuna is in the 50 homer range?! With Olson, I think! OK? Tell me I’m right!” [rips IV from arm] “Tell me I’m right!” No, not much has gone right for the Braves this year, but Reynaldo Lopez has done as well as he could. Do the numbers below support this? No, it’s not. Not even a little bit. I was surprised at how decent Reynaldo’s peripherals were – 9.2 K/9, 3.1 BB/9, 38% GB%, low homers allowed. The weak contact made it all work, but to answer you, your catcher, he doesn’t jump like a 2 ERA pitcher. “But Spencer Strider is here, right? Tell me I’m right!” Anyway, here’s what I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Gio Ursela – 0-for-3, 1 RBI as signed by the Braves to play 3rd. When I think about how much I loved him after his 21-homer 2019 season. [wavy lines]….Ah, it’s March 2020 again–hey, how come I have no memories from now until 2021?…[wavy lines] Huh, that was weird. Any hoo! Urhela has a strong connection and nothing else. An NL-Only game, at best.
Jeimer Candelario – Placed in IL for toe fracture. [Jeimer mistakes a medicine ball for a soccer ball] “Hey, look, I’m Messi! ….But what!” This prolly helps Noelvi continue to get ABs, even with the addition of Amed Rosario, but, as I said the other day, I’d go for Amed over Marte if I were you, and send Marte down to get help in his turn.
Carson Spiers – 4 1/3 IP, 9 ER, 5.43 ERA. Hey, do you mind if I leave my grape juice here while I go to the bathroom at this al Qaeda bar? Good! [four hours later]…Boy, I have to go to sleep. Well, why is that guy measuring my spleen? HHHHH!!! The roof!!!
George Springer – 2-for-5, 3 RBIs and his 15th and 16th homers, hitting .222. Also, in this game, Spencer Horwitz (1-for-4) hit his 7th homer; Leo Jimenez (2-for-4, 2 RBIs) hit his 3rd homer and Alejandro Kirk (1-for-3) hit his 4th homer. It was a good day for the “Those boys are bad at fantasy”.
Jose Berrios – 7 IP, 2 ER, 8 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 3.79. The Jays jumped out to a big lead and Berrios went out to the Victory Coast on a free night at the W.
Eduardo Rodriguez – 5 1/3 IP, 1 ER, 7 baserunners, 5 Ks, ERA at 3.94. He can wake up from an 18 month hibernation Van Winkle style and pitch 5+ innings.
Corbin Carroll – 2-for-4, 2 runs and his 14th homer. The energy in the 2nd half is good. I wouldn’t be too concerned if he had a few triple steal games.
Lourdes Gurriel Jr. – 1-for-3 with his 15th homer. Lu-Gu-Ju usually gets pretty hot when he gets a homer, so get ready for a schmotato run.
Edward Cabrera – 6 IP, 3 ER, 7 baserunners, 3 Ks, ERA at 5.65. I watched most of this show (Ed-Rod’s, but still), and I don’t know what happened to EdCab, but he looks great. EdRod looked better than EdCab. It sounds like a proverb. I saved EdCab for EdRod.
Frankie Montas – 7 IP, 0 ER, 1 hit, 1 walk, 3 Ks, ERA at 4.57. Everyone talks about how the Rays coach pitchers, but the Brewers took a lot of Just A Guys and turned them into great ones.
Jose Quintana – 5 IP, 7 ER, ERA at 4.57. Oh, why do I feel pain? Five seconds earlier, “Broadcasting Quintana non-stop for three months won’t hurt me!”
JD Martinez – 1-for-4, 3 RBIs and his 14th homer, and 2nd homer in as many games. Just Dong because everything else is Just Don’t.
Zach Eflin – Hit IL with shoulder swelling. Wait, the ex-Rays pitcher they traded is damaged? Hmm, can’t relate. Albert Suarez moved from the O’s 6th starter to the 2nd. However, replacing Eflin will be Cade Povich. Someone should sit Maury on stage and surprise him with Cade’s paternity test. Never! I wouldn’t trust Povich.
Anthony Santander – 1-for-5, 2 RBIs and his 37th homer, hitting .239. I don’t know for sure but it seems like he has more 1-for-4 or 1-for-5 games with a homer than anyone else.
Dean Kremer – 6 IP, 1 ER, 5 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 4.30. You know what’s funny in a way that’s not funny? If you have multiple teams like me, you have one team that broadcasts Quintana and milks you, but you have another team that broadcasts Kremer. Wherever I looked, I took the right step! (Except for the places where I made the wrong move.)
Hector Neris – DFA’d by Lambs. Celine Dion’s dream team, “Neris/Faris, Wherever You Are,” takes on another brutal song. He will never hold his own in the end. He might be wise to pick up Porter Hodge (1 IP, 0 ER, and his second save yesterday) or hedge Hodge and Jorge Lopez.
Javier Assad – 5 2/3 IP, 1 ER, 7 baserunners, 7 Ks, ERA at 3.11. The second game in five innings pitched since June 23. If you want Assad to go deep, you end up saying, “I’m sad.”
Joey Gallo – Configured in IL. Yepez haz stoppez hits a little, but playing Gallo over Yepez is a fiery offense. However, I am not convinced that Davey Martinez will ever be fired. It looks like he has carte blanche after winning the World Series. Five years ago!
Angel Chivilli – 1 IP, 0 ER, 4.70 ERA, as he got the Rockies save because Victor Vodnik has a sore shoulder. If above your dream team you have a sign that says, “God Bless This Mess,” then grab Chivilli. Otherwise, no, are you crazy?
Tyler Mahle – Hit IL with shoulder pain. If you get a call from a number that isn’t in your contacts, make sure you take it, it might be an MLB team looking for you to give it a few innings.
Cody Bradford – 7 IP, 3 ER, 5 hits, zero walks, 8 Ks, ERA at 3.56. My sleeping monocle is on my eye and it’s starting to shift.
Mitch Keller – 7 IP, 0 ER, 3 hits, zero walks, 9 Ks, ERA at 3.76. I don’t know anyone who goes out there and gives up 15 ER in his previous 9 IP, and looks as bright as Keller.
Edwin Uceta – 1 1/3 IP, 0 ER, 0.90 ERA. Wow, it’s exciting. Right, the closest Rays are Uceta and forgetta.
Shane Baz – 7 2/3 IP, 0 ER, 6 baserunners, 4 Ks, ERA at 3.48. The A’s are far from pushing home games. They are middle-of-the-pack-ish. But Shane Baz was surprised. He was shocked. His base numbers are pretty good (4 Ks in about 8 IP?), but it’s still a small sample.
Joey Estes – 7 2/3 IP, 1 ER, 4 baserunners, 5 Ks, ERA at 4.44. It’s embarrassing how I was betting all of the A’s starters this past Sunday in FAAB. Streamonator doesn’t like him, but radiation just doesn’t scare me.
Patrick Bailey – Click IL. Luckily the Giants have Joey Bart–Oh wait.
Robbie Ray – 6 2/3 IP, 1 ER, 3 hits, zero walks, 9 Ks, ERA at 4.88. Such an easy pairing for Shite Sux at home, but hopefully Ray will do this in his next start like he’s got his tight pants on.
Ryan Jeffers – 2-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 20th homer, and third homer in four games. Random prediction alert! He’ll be free throughout the draft next year, as if he’s not a top 7-ish catcher.
Ha-Seong Kim – Hit IL with shoulder swelling. MRI revealed no structural damage. An MRI revealed the crush on a CT scan. Good stuff.
Jurickson Profar – 1-for-4, 3 RBIs and his 20th homer, hitting .290. One should ask him, “Do you know that this is your time of work as it happens?”
Manny Machado – 1-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 20th homer. Elias Sports Bureau heard Profar and Machado both hit 20 on August 20 and said, “This is the first time this has happened, we think. Jim spilled Fanta on our computer.”
Walker Buehler – 4 IP, 3 ER, 6.09 ERA. In his next start, he will be playing with Dustin May’s elbow strain.
Max Muncy – 1-for-2, 2 runs and his 11th homer, 2nd homer in two games since IL return. Max is a Muncist!
Gavin Lux – 1-for-4 with his 10th homer, and second homer in two games. You keep saying you’re hot, you go back a month and you keep waiting for something.
Matthew Boyd – 5 1/3 IP, 3 ER, 8 baserunners, 2 Ks, ERA at 3.38. An amazing start. Colin Rea has played better in the last four months. No one cares about Rea. Boyd though? People love Boyd for mediocre results.
Brian Rocchio – 3-for-5 with a slam (6) and a walk (9). Most slam and legs of the week go to….Still Adrian Del Castillo.
Luis Gil – 3 IP, 3 ER, 3 hits, 6 BBs, 3 Ks, ERA at 3.39, and left with back pain. Except it should have been closed in June. It’s very good. I’m sure this won’t have long term effects on his arm.
Aaron is the judge – 2-for-5, 3 RBIs and his 45th homer. He’s on pace for 58 homers. Is that good?
Juan Soto – 1-for-5 with his 35th homer. He is in the $500 million contract phase. Is that good?
Johnny Cueto – The angels sent him back. dot dot. The tone? I have no idea. Taking care of their horses? True story, I went to see what Cueto was doing to the kids, and found Urhela’s clip talking about him. Welcome back, guys! It’s great to see teams in smaller leagues give their chances to play.
Tyler Anderson – 6 IP, 5 ER, 14 baserunners, 2 Ks, ERA at 3.46. You can look at Streamonator, but then again it’s almost the end of August and his ERA is better than your entire fantasy team, and I wouldn’t trust him.
Zach Neto – 2-for-5, 2 runs and his 19th homer, and 2nd homer in as many games. It was mentioned yesterday how important he was as Corey Seager. Now prolly more important. (Player Rater updates at midnight if I’m up at night-night God bless.)
Yainer Diaz – 2-for-4 with his 15th homer, second homer in two games, third homer in three games, and the top hitter of the last month. And he’s on pace to surpass Adley Rutschman on Player Rater for the entire season. Oh, and you dropped Yainer in April so ignore this.
Ronel Blanco – 3 2/3 IP, 5 ER, ERA at 3.14 vs. Nick Pivetta – 5 IP, 5 ER, ERA at 4.70. This match was billed as, “I’m glad it’s Blanco/Pivetta and not Banco de Pivetta because I’d be confused right now.”
Jarren Duran – 4-for-4, 3 runs, 2 RBIs and his 17th homer, 2nd homer in two games. Can I draft 2025 Duran already?
Residences in Triston Casas – 2-for-3, 3 RBIs and his 7th homer. Love Casas. Singing Our House by Madness is now my favorite. I’m so glad that it looks like whatever was bothering him earlier this year isn’t bothering him now that he’s back. It’s a good thing.
Dominic Smith – Released by the Red Sox. The Mets should bring him home. Dress him up as Grimace and plant his ass on the bench. Then, “Hey, it looks like Alonso did something. Alas, Keith, with the sound clock, there was no time to change, and here comes Dom Smith to strike as Grimace. Think he’ll be skating all the time.”
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