For perhaps the first time this season, there are good quality picks at the top of the first two weekly pitchers. Aaron Nola is flexible enough that he won’t make you feel as warm and cozy as you’d like when setting up your show, but such is life. Anyway, this week’s offering has more individual player blurbstomps (not Blurbstomps) than any other so far, so let’s get to it.
The following are our guesses at the time of writing as to who will start two games this week, but the weather, injuries, and secret team management mean they are just that: guesses. To stay as up-to-date as possible, consult Rudy Gamble’s invaluable Streamonator.
Chocolate Chip Cookies (A Must-Start)
They are the kings of the cookie world for a reason. A warm, freshly baked chocolate chip cookie makes you feel good. Kind of like setting your plans you know you’re getting a double this week from these guys.
| It’s a jar | The beginning of the beginning | The Second Beginning |
|---|---|---|
| Corbin Burnes, Bal | TOR | THE SEA |
| Yoshinobu Yamamoto, LAD | @SF | CIN |
| Carlos Rodon, NYY | @MIN | CHW |
| George Kirby, Sea | KC | @BAL |
| Shoto Imanaga, CHC | @ATL | The PIT |
| Aaron Nola, Ph | @NYM | WSH |
- The last time Rodon appeared in this column, I was worried that his play would start to look like his subpar metrics. The Savant’s blade still has more blue than you’d like to see, but the velocity has been dialed back and the slide looks like a classic weapon.
Sugar Cookies (Must Start)
They went well. You could certainly do a lot worse than having these guys on your list, but don’t expect it to be spectacular.
| It’s a jar | The beginning of the beginning | The Second Beginning |
|---|---|---|
| Ronel Blanco, Hou | OAK | The MIL |
| Kutter Crawford, Bos | TB | @STL |
| Zach Eflin, TB | @BOS | @TOR |
| Brady Singer, KC | @SEA | @OK |
| Christopher Sanchez, Phi | @NYM | WSH |
| Jordan Montgomery, Ari | CIN | DET |
| Hunter Greene, Cin | @ARI | @LAD |
| Mitch Keller, Pit | @MIL | @CHC |
| Reynaldo Lopez, Atl | CHC | SD |
| Jordan Hicks, SF | LAD | COL |
| Jose Berrios, Tor | @BAL | TB |
- This is higher than the Streamonator with Crawford this week, for what it’s worth, but I don’t care. He’s been solid this season and that matchup for the Cardinals looks pretty good.
- As I write, the Pirates have not announced who will start on Monday. It’s worth double-checking to be sure, but it would be a shock if Keller wasn’t leading the church.
- Berrios has been lit for the last time and the metrics say he has been very successful so far. The Baltimore comparison isn’t exactly inspiring either. To be honest, he should be on the bottom line, but I didn’t want to rearrange the tables at this point.
Oatmeal Raisin Cookies (Can Start)
This is not for everyone. These are the jars that can be a happy surprise, or they can ruin your church. Step slowly.
| It’s a jar | The beginning of the beginning | The Second Beginning |
|---|---|---|
| Tanner Bibee, Cle | @TEX | MIN |
| Gavin Stone, LAD | @SF | CIN |
| Nick Pivetta, Bos | TB | @STL |
| Chris Paddack, Min | NYY | @CLE |
| Jose Butto, NYM | PHI | @MIA |
| Sean Manaea, NYM | PHI | @MIA |
| Aaron Civale, TB | @BOS | @TOR |
| Colin Rea, Mil | The PIT | @HOU |
- Drafted Tanner Bibee expects a lot better than the 4.91 ERA and 1.36 WHIP he’s gotten so far. Is this the week he will answer? It’s possible! Can I be sure that it is? No!
- While Bibee has been bad so far, Civale has been worse. Because as much as many people were happy when he was traded to the Rays, he was very cruel. from Cleveland. You should get a decent number of hits when you start, but your ratings can be light.
Fortune Cookies (Don’t Start)
Yes, technically cookies. Hold on, what does that little piece of paper say? “Bad times pass.” Oh. Oh well.
| It’s a jar | The beginning of the beginning | The Second Beginning |
|---|---|---|
| Kenta Maeda, Det | MIA | @ARI |
| Graham Ashcraft, Cin | @ARI | @LAD |
| JP Sears, Oak | @HOU | @KC |
| Chris Flexen, CHW | WSH | @NYY |
| Randy Vasquez, SD | COL | @ATL |
| Hayden Wesneski, CHC | @ATL | The PIT |
| Jose Soriano, LAA | STL | @TEX |
| Trevor Williams, Wsh | @CHW | @PHI |
| Spencer Arrighetti, Hou | OAK | The MIL |
| Sixto Sanchez, Mia | @DET | NYM |
| Martin Perez, Pit | @MIL | @CHC |
| Jack Leiter, Tex | CLE | LAA |
| Peter Lambert, Col |
@SD | @SF |
| Osvaldo Bido, Oak | @HOU | @KC |
- Flexen’s comparison to the Yankees saves me from the temptation to suggest that you consider him an option. His last three starts have been solid, I know. But what do you do? you Do you trust him to keep it? I’m not sure.
- Flexen is down at this level despite three strong starts in a row. Everything Seven Trevor Williams’ debut was great! And one of the starts is against the White Sox! I know. But another start is against the Phillies. And he’s Trevor Williams. Maybe luck will come to you, but I don’t believe it.
- Sixto is the one who revealed that he will take the hill twice this week in Miami, but it has not been officially announced at the time of writing. If it has to be Ryan Weathers in that place instead…you really don’t want to be fishing in that water either.
- Pirates live to make my life difficult. Perez is slated here as one of the starting two this week, but that’s under the assumption that Quinn Priester stays in a long relief role or is demoted. Either way you take these starters, you don’t want to use them.
- It could be Jack Leiter who starts twice. Or, it could be Michael Lorenzen who starts twice. You don’t really want to use any of them. I hate all these teams with bad pitchers which makes it hard for me to tell you which bad pitchers you don’t use.
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